The Ultimate Couple
by LazalotAnreads
Summary: Xander tells us about how he and Graham fell in love.


Title: The Ultimate Couple

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: dracovontrapp

Characters/Pairings: Graham/Xander

Rating: NC-17

Word Count: 1,568

Challenge: B-Day fic for luvxander, who requested romance and sex

Summary: Xander tells us about how he and Graham fell in love.

Notes: Sap, sap, and more sap

I'm still not entirely sure how it happened. I mean, yeah, I'd noticed guys before – I was confident in my sexuality enough to know that noticing guys once in awhile didn't mean I was gay. I just liked to look … or so I told myself.

Then Riley came back from wherever the hell he'd been and brought along a friend. Apparently, the Initiative was still up to no good, and they didn't want to be a part of it anymore. They wanted to do some _real_ slaying.

Buffy welcomed Riley with open arms, of course, and Spike was shattered. He's not like other Vampires, you know. He may not have a soul, but he definitely has a heart. Somehow he ended up moving back in with me, and I did my best to put him back together again. We became pretty good friends in the process; we actually have a lot in common, which was a huge surprise to both of us. Spike was the first person I told about my gay crush.

Graham was a really quiet guy, which made him a seriously boring patrolling partner. He never walked beside me, either – he always had to be a step ahead. I found myself spending way too much time ogling his tight ass. After the third night, I started to panic.

Well, can you blame me? I mean, I wasn't a homophobe or anything, but that didn't mean that _I_ wanted to be gay. Or bisexual. Whatever – I didn't want to want to have sex with another guy, but my dick paid no attention to my sexual identity crisis.

When I told Spike, he laughed so hard he actually fell off the couch, which really pissed me off. It really wasn't a laughing matter. I was attracted to a _man_. A gorgeous man, yes, but still a man. A man that could andd probably would kick my ass if he ever found out that I was attracted to him.

But when he was done laughing, Spike started to talk. I was still angry, but I desperately needed help, and Spike happens to be a very wise Vampire. I listened, and after awhile, it didn't seem like such a big deal anymore. Spike was right; what did gender really matter, anyway? If you're attracted to someone, you're attracted to them. Why should I care what parts they had?

So I decided to put it behind me. It's not like I was going to act on it or anything, right? I was just enjoying the view. Besides, Graham was the one who insisted on walking in front of me. He probably thought of me as more of a damsel than a slaying partner, which sucked, but I knew eventually I'd get the chance to show him how wrong he was. I'd taken to studying Giles' old books and letting Spike teach me everything he knew. I was pretty sure I could kick Graham's ass if for some reason I had to, but I wasn't about to tell him that.

I don't know exactly when it happened, but somehow Graham and I became friends. I figured having seen me dust seven Vampires in fifteen minutes without getting so much as a scratch made him rethink his original opinion of me. He _finally_ started walking beside me, and even spoke once in awhile. It turned out we made a pretty good team, too – the two of us together managed to slay some pretty serious baddies once in awhile. Even Giles was impressed with us.

Whenever we had a slow night, it became habit to invite him to the Bronze for a few games of pool, or back to my place for a movie and a couple of beers when I knew Spike was out. Graham knew he lived with me and actually seemed to _like_ Spike, but I preferred it to be just the two of us when we hung out. We took turns paying for stuff. I didn't realize it at the time, but looking back now, we were pretty much dating. Neither of us ever mentioned it, though, so when it finally happened, I was more than a little shocked.

We weren't drunk or anything – we'd only had three beers each and we were just relaxing on the couch, watching some movie I don't remember at all because suddenly Graham just turned and _kissed_ me. Right on the lips – no tongue or anything, just a gentle brush of his lips on mine before he said goodnight and left. My lips tingled and my hard cock throbbed, but I didn't move.

I sat on the couch all night, thinking about that kiss. How it made me feel – yeah, I knew I was hot for the guy, but I hadn't realized I was in _love_ with him. When Spike got home, we talked about it, but it didn't help as much as the first time. I mean, lust is one thing, but _love_? That's some serious shit, and I'm not ashamed to say I had quite a few freak outs.

But after a good day's rest – and thank God I hadn't had to work – I wasn't really scared anymore. I was just so _nervous_. I mean, what was I supposed to say to the guy? I couldn't just tell him I loved him out of nowhere – he'd probably run away screaming and get eaten by something ugly and evil. So I decided to just keep my mouth shut about it when we patrolled, but when we were done I found myself inviting over again. It wasn't intentional – my dick had momentarilly comandeered my mouth. Still, I didn't regret making the offer. I'd have done just about anything to be close to Graham.

That time it wasn't just a little peck. I'd just gotten the door shut when he spun me around and took my mouth in the most amazing kiss I'd ever experienced in my life. He didn't stop there, either. Thank whoever that Spike tended to make a nuisance of himself scarce at night, patrolling alone, because I doubt he would have wanted to see Graham and I ripping each others' clothes off right in the middle of the living room – then again, maybe he would have. I don't know, and I don't particularly care.

Somewhere between the door and the bedroom, we slowed everything down, and I realized that I wasn't just some convenient fuck for him. No, Graham just wasn't that type of guy – and even if I hadn't already figured that out on my own, I would have known by the way he eased me gently down to the bed and made love to my mouth, as if I were the only thing that existed in his world. I'd _never_ felt so special in my entire insane life.

He was careful, but not _too_ careful. When he finally slid inside it burned so perfectly, I almost wanted to cry. I _didn't_, of course, it wouldn't have been very manly if I had. It felt like Graham was everywhere inside me, though, like he was fucking his way into my very _soul_. It felt like my first time, the way it _should_ have been, and in a way, I guess it was.

"Xander, Xander," he repeated my name like a mantra while he worshipped my body with hands and mouth and cock, and I gave as good as I got. I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his shoulders and arched into every thrust, tightening my muscles and making enough noise to wake the dead. It was absolutely _amazing_.

I came first, actually screaming so loud that the neighbors started pounding on the wall, but I couldn't give a shit about it. Graham followed almost immediately, still groaning my name like it was the only word he knew. I felt precious and valuable for the first time in my life, when he pulled me into his arms afterwards and stroked my hair, whispering to me about how long he'd wanted me, how much he loved me. It made me feel like some sort of god, the way he gazed at me.

I looked him in the eyes then, and told him I loved him too. I told him a hell of a lot of other things as well – we talked about everything and nothing until we finally dozed off sometime around dawn, tangled together. I slept better than I had since I found out that I lived on the freaking Hellmouth.

Well, that's our story. That's how Graham and I got together. It's been three years now and we're still together – our love has only deepened over time. We're the ultimate couple, as Buffy is constantly telling me. She often says that Graham and I are perfect for each other in every way and will probably be together forever. I hoped more than anything that she is right, because I'm pretty sure that losing Graham would kill me.

So I'm gay now. So what? Spike is right, you know; gender doesn't mean a damn thing when it comes to true love.


End file.
